Roy knows all
by Angelthunder
Summary: Roy has a new mission. To answer your questions! If he doesnt get any to answer, he will be demoted and he will never achieve his dream of being Furher. send him questions to help him! or we might find out if he can send flame alchemy via email...
1. a new mission!

To the readers,

I am Roy Mustang. The Flame Alchemist! I have a new assignment. To answer questions of random people in the world. So, post questions and help me with my mission. Or we will find out if I can send flame alchemy via email. Cuz if I don't finish it, I will be demoted. THAT IS NOT GOOD! I will never become Furher and my dream will never come true if you don't! (sob) ahem. So, post questions in a review. Thank you for your time.

Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist.


	2. page one

BEHOLD! the first page of questions!

_

* * *

_

_ok? what kind of questions? like if you ever thought of Riza like your wife?_

_stuff like that? and no I don't want you getting demoted so there I gave my_

_help.i hope that would make you happy._

_fullmetal-flame-lover_

well, erm, I might have….

Riza: What was that?

Roy: Nothing! Nothing at all. That miniskirt plan will come into action when I am Furher…… and yes. It did make me happy.

-

_Odd...u should have mentioned the miniskirts!!_

_Soichiro_

I wanted too! But Angelthunder said I couldn't because it's in her file…maybe I should get my own……

-

_I have one for Envy. Ahem,_

_Why do you wear a mid-drift and skort? It is scary! It scares little_

_Children!... and why do you choose to have your hair like that? if you can change_

_it, can't you get a better one? GET BETTER HAIR! And do you ever have to wash_

_Your hair? Random, but, if you can shape-shift, do you just make it clean?_

_Herineca_

Yes, for the other readers, you can ask questions to other people as well. As the title states, I know all. But I can get them down here. So, ENVY! BUTT! HERE! NOW!

Envy: what.

Roy: you have a question.

Envy: I have a what?

Roy: A QUESTION, DAMMIT! Don't you pay attention?

Envy: apparently not, but I am busy with my own life. (Reads) -.-….I am in this form because it is my cute form. It's also breezy. And it does not scare little children! I do that on my own. And I like my hair! It's cool! And no, I don't have to wash it because I'm awesome and make it clean when ever I shape shift. Ya happy Match stick man?

Roy:...(sighs)… yes.

-

_Oh! I have one!(or 4) Ahem..._

_Mein Fuhrer,(do you know what I just said? If not, ask my darling Edo) _

_Question 1:Are you gay? _

_Question 2: Tell the truth. Have you ever thought dirty thoughts about my little_

_Edo? _

_Question 3: What would you do if Ed came walking into your office wearing his_

_usual boots, fishnet stockings, a short black miniskirt that barely covers him_

_and his tight muscle shirt, what would you do?_

_And Question 4: Why don't you just torch Armstrong's creepy ass?_

_fullmetal'sgirl92_

Question one: no I am not gay.

Question two: no. I can safely say that I have never had bad thoughts about Ed.

Question three: I would tell him to go to fullmetal'sgirl92's house. Then tell him to get more clothes.

Question four: Because he is a valued member of the military... and if he should be hurt with burns all over him, the blame would be put on me. And that would not be good.

-

_Letter 1:_

_Mein Fuhrer Mustang,_

_Be truthful now, if you found out that someone had sexually harassed one of your_

_subordinates -coffEDcoff- would you hunt them down and torch their ass? _

_Letter 2:_

_Mein Fuhrer Mustang,_

_Are you aware that there is a small army waiting for your leadership... an army_

_of MINISKIRTS... Come and lead us mein Fuhrer! (Sieg Hail!_

_Roy-Fan-33_

One: I would give them a long boring lecture. And make them take notes. Then torch his butt.

Two: I am now. I will when I am Furher!

-

_Hey Mustang, since you've gotten gay with so many people, my question is this:_

_Have you ever gotten gay with Armstrong?_

_Monkey Mist Robo_

Why does everyone think I'm gay? I am not gay! sigh I'm beginning to wonder wether this mission was worth it or not……

-

_Oi, I got one, it's half stupid but, meh..._

_Ahem, To Roy,_

_What in the name of hell is with that obsession of yours? The Miniskirts... Most_

_times, They're scary O.o_

_Really scary, so why do You like them? Is it cuz u know if you had the chance,_

_you'd want a reason to put Riza in one? hehehe..._

_StaticElectricity_

I like miniskirts…and it confirms my sexuality. I like girls. AND I AM NOT GAY! And sure…

-

_What will you do when you saw Edward and Envy making out?_

_AntennaGirl_

Ok…you have bad grammar. Improve your grammar, missy! And my answer to your lovely question, ahem: (spoiler)

THAT IS SICK! THEY ARE HALF-BROTHERS! (For all who didn't know that, now you do) and I'd burn the room to the ground.

-

Thank you for your questions. I am one step closer to my miniskirt plan!

Riza and every other girl in the room: -.-

Roy: I, uh, mean, being Furher?

P.S. If I hear one more thing about my sexuality, I WILL TORCH YOU ALL! I AM NOT GAY!


	3. AN

this story is on hold because ive found that i dont have the time to do this story so sorry it was a fun idea though me and a friend were high on coke and choclate wen we thought of it so yea soz...


End file.
